we broke up

or are in a cool off phase. don't know. i'm lito, he's hilo.

it's just not working between maximo and me. i was warned. a mac and a former pc user coud never make it work. hah!

the past two days i've been working and composing as if i was on smack. then yesterday, maximo hung on me. he's never done that to me before. masyado ko daw pinapansin ang trabaho ko. tapos kapag quality time na namin, puro kikay sites at trailers at chat sa kaibigan daw ang inaatupag ko. wala na daw akong panahon sa needs niya--katulag ng cache cleaning, drive optimization or virus scan update. wala na daw siyang pahinga. kaya nagtampo siya. mukhang ayaw na nya akong kausapin.

this morning i tried again to start a dialogue with him. he didn't even want to let me log in. kaya yun, bago ako pumunta sa appointment ko sa french embassy, pinasok ko siya sa bag ko. "tara, we're going to the doctor."

i lugged that damn heavy bag to the french consul, in heels and a fitted skirt. i looked good but damn did i hurt. waited half a day to get sorted and then went to a random ass cafe to eat the worst fajitas in the world and be insulted by some rude spanish waiter. but i was hungry so i made do. and i lugged him all the way to the apple center(this is why i love geeks, they respond to me. geeks are the sweetest men in the world. they fitted me in despite the tight schedule and they didn't make me feel stupid about maximo dying. i was afraid that i'd get this patronizing oh-what-did-ou-do-little-girl speach. no naman.)
but maximo's hardrive is fried, he wouldn't respond to basic commands or allow a diagnostic disk to find out what was wrong. apparently the time for dialogue has long since passed. so i'm buying a new hard-drive and the geeks have promised to try and retreive my files. fortunately i backed up my files before maximo completely shut down but there are a lot of photographs that i don't want to lose. :( snif. apple is damn expensive for repairs, pero sige na nga.

i'm using sheena's extra computer in the meantime. i uploaded the files to my gmail account for extra back-up and i'm printng more stuff out in a bit. it's a good thing this is all in my head and that i DID manage to make back-ups. arrrrhhhh...

i'm begin very zen abut this though. i've been far too dependent on computers and maybe this exercise will be good for me. i'll spend more time on the books and on revising. i've got a great new ideas for the history section.

deep breath. very deep breath.